Los Angeles is getting to me. I noticed it when I walked into my new class and had stuff to say. I wasn't shy and awkward. And I didn't laugh too much.
The thing with a new class is that I notice how I've changed since the first one. The whole Raleigh Studios thing is still new to them, and people say things like "What have they done besides The Closer?" And I ask myself, "What sort of question is that? The Closer is kind of a big deal. And if that's not, then what is?"
My opinions are quieter, unless I'm with friends or talking on the phone with folks from Chicago. Quieter, though, does not mean that I'm at the ideal stage of "like-land" in which anything, it seems, is worthwhile.
It's also weird to see the "puppy" effect again. Our first week of drama writing, any time an instructor or speaker asked a question, we practically bit one-another's heads off to answer--like puppies biting each other's ears to be the one to go to a new home. It all starts again--people competing rather than helping. It's more about notice and knowledge. Thing is, everyone expects you to fight your way to the top. It's like a quest, I suppose.
Most days, I feel like I'm learning a lot. I still have my moments where I just get frustrated and lonely, but, for the most part, I feel like I can see some measurable difference in my ability to handle H-town.
I guess that's it for tonight. This was a weird day. And a weird post. I need a hike.
2 comments:
Jockeying for the top spot is what LALA-land is all about, sadly.
I know you're lonely out there, but you have reinforcements coming, at ease soldier, France won't be taken in a fortnight and Europe won't be won in a month. It takes manpower, siege tactics, and a shitload of airbourne attacks to weaken the modern defenses.
Don't worry, we have the technology, we have the boots on the ground, we are coming, and it is for certain that we are strong.
Nothing will defeat the will and strength of this Army...nothing.
'Tis good that things are kinda finally falling into place and such. Things can only get better, yes?
I was listening to a podcast where Adam Carolla was talking about change (sparked by his recent job loss): pretty much, change can seem bad or traumatizing as first, but is it really? Nah, it's just another door opening. We keep living and learning. It kind of reminded me a lot of what's going on right now with a lot of people I know, including you. (:
Just thought I'd share it with you. If I find the podcast, I might send it to you, I thought it was rather inspiring.
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